..a day of information gathering..

so today there is no slum visit, no community visit, no youth meetings, today is the day we (Susanne and i) have been waiting for, a day that will turn out to be much better than we could even imagine..one thing that you need know, if you have never done trainings for other people, that is, you can prepare as much as you want to, but it is really the first couple of minutes of that particular training that will decide how the overall outcome will be, it is here where you set the tone for the whole day(s), where you get the team to be interactive, participate, laugh, smile and share... - or it is here where you loose all of the above! needless to say that any trainer stepping into a session with a group of people he / she has never met before is one thing, but stepping into a group that is soo incredible different from your own culture as Sweden / Denmark and India is, is a completely diffferent thing, to do that, that is stressful, that is very tense, and it is some challenge, so add on top of that, the fact that we were suppose to start at 10.30, we arrived at 10.45, and nobody was there, the room was locked, and we stood on the stairwell, waiting for 15 min, then waited additional 15 - 20 min once we came into the room.. - all in all not the kinda start that you dream of as a trainer, it is actually one of your worst nightmares.. - if not THE worse one! So finally we manage to get started, it is all or nothing, oh one more thing we are working through a translator that makes it even more fun, so we kick it off, and i am happy to say that within 2 min, Susanne and i have their full attention, you can see how much they are trying to catch all the words we are saying in English, hoping that will understand at least something, then waiting impatiently to get it translated into Tamil, only to reflect and do the woppel, it feels great to finally be working with them, it feels great to have their attention, i am so more relaxed now, and i am getting into my "zone" i am reminded a couple of time by Prija (our translator) that she needs time also to translate, she is smiling and can see my excitement for finally working with the team here - so Susanne and i have really never working together before, but i have to admit, i feel like i know her working style so well, and seemingly she knows mine, so we ping pong over thoughts, questions, input, feedback, left, right, up and down around the group, it is dynamic, it is fast, it is full of stories, experience, conversations, and thoughts and ideas..and the team seems to enjoy it a great deal, they are some much more active that i dared hope for, they are sharing their problems, and their ideas, suggestions, and we address a lot of relevant items, and then it happens........ - electricity goes down, fanes are off, and it is 35 degrees and we are right in the sun, i feel it coming, within 5 min my shirt is wet, and i am dripping from my forehead, i am struggling to a balance between coaching, training and drinking enough water to ensure that i will not collapse. I manage to take down almost 2 ltr of water in less than 60 min. and still i am forcing myself to drink more, one thing i have learned by now is that water bottles are key to success in india, you need to have water with you all the time, otherwise good luck...

After continuing without electricity we reach the point of having a short lunch break, and this is where it gets even more interesting, the chairs are being taken away and one lady comes with some paper sheets, they kinda look like normal A-4 sheets, just green, she comes with a huuuug pot of rice, literally enough for a small army, another pot with sauce, and then she starts to serve to +20 people, fried rice, sauce and fried boiled eggs (which is really delicious, imagine boiled eggs, then fried) it is absolutely perfect, of course we are eating with our right hand, i am actually getting the hang on this - i really enjoy eating with my hand (not sure it would go well in Slovakia...), the first portion is done, and automatically i am getting served another one, i didnt even manage to say yes or no, she just serves as a reflex, so we ask her if she made it all herself, and she answers that she got up early to prepare for all of us and that she is very happy that we are eating her food, and that it is a privellige for her to be allowed to cook for us - wow, i mean honestly i feel it as a privellige that somebody can be bothered cooking for me, that doesnt happy to often.. so i eat this portion and i am full, it was great - by fare the best food i have had in Chennai till now... and then i start to hear berbing sounds from some to the women, and cant help to ask if it is accepted, they answer something funny "a berp is the stomach that tell you, you are full".. i find it funny, and sweet - again i am not sure it would be accepted in restaurants in Europe.. :-)) so lunch is almost over and we are about to get up, oh did i forget to tell you - the lunch was served on the floor in the room we are having the training in - you have to love India .... and so, slowly but sure that is what i am starting to do - fall in love with India, almost like love at first sight..

Lunch is over, stomachs are full, heads are spinning with thoughts and ideas, and it is time for us to get some excitement going, so susanne kicks off the session with a game, and they are loving it is - they are laughing and sincerely having fun, we again didnt know what to expect with having them do a game, but now we know - they love games (mental note - this team really loves sweets and games, add more of this on the next training :-) after the game, we go into group conversations, and the conversations are flying around the room, if we had dynamics before, we now see fireworks (maybe because Diwali is soo close by..) they are discussing, talking, listening, asking, writing, laughing and smiling.. - and i couldnt be more happy than i am right now, it is running perfect. After some 40 min of having them doing group exercises they are asked to come and present to the others in the group, they do so with great pride, which is wonderful, we all discuss what we found, and how to move from there, we work through the hours like ice in the sun, and then our afternoon caj is coming, more water, more work, more translation, more conversations, discussions, more sharing, more feedback, more input ... but above all, more interaction - i almost dont believe my own eyes, they are seemingly only getting in 3rd gear, and now they warmed up, and then all of a sudden it is time to summarize and close off this first session with them - it is already after 17 and many of them have a long way home - it seems like nobody really want to finish the session, least of all me ... - i am so happy, so excited, and soo proud of our team, and i share that with them, i ask them to give us 1 thing the got out of this session, and we hear a lot of great things, i hear my name in Tamil several times (and this makes me go red - i swear, you can ask Susanne about it ...) one man even tells me that he sees my energy and dynamics as great and that i use my body language very good (i will others judge me on that one - for those of you who really know me, know that i am not good in taking compliments..) - i take this as an opportunity to of course thank him, but also to ask him why he thinks that i use my body language so much as i do - he answers "because you love what you do, it is your passion and it excites you, and this rubs off on people" ... i ask him if he will do that one he trains, he answers "aboslutely"

... Today was a wonderful day ... - a long day, a great day, a day of new information, a day of new faces, a day of new ideas and thoughts, a day of excitement, a day of energy, a day of dynamics, a day of fireworks, a day of passion .. but most important, today was the first day of what i believe will be many more great days with this wonderful team of people ...

..an evening meeting with Indias future leaders..

okay so last posting for tonight, as it is already 22 here, so i wanted to share with you a short little post, a post that is about Susanne and i sitting down in a meeting with a youth commitee, with youngsters between 19 to 23, after another short introduction of who we are an why we are here, we ask each of them to introduce themselves, they are all either at university or just done with university - some already having their first job, after the introduction they become full of anticipation - what are these two people going to say or ask, Susanne and i, have developed great "interviewing skills" and we have now have a natural flow of asking questions, following up on each others questions, we start to ask them about what they believe are the issues in India now a days, what they would like to change, how they plan on changing their communities, we talk about the roles within the communities, the lack of respect that many men have towards women, and how these must change and will change with them being the new generation of Chennai.. After having our initial round of questions, i feel the need for me to challenge them a bit - so i ask them about what they will do now and in the near future, they having very good answers, they want to join politics to make different regulation changes, they want to become police officers to get rid of corruption, they want to work as social workers to engage the different groups into more developing their communities even more, they want to start NGOs to have higher local impact on people, all in all these young ones have ideas, they have passion, they have a drive, they realize that they are the future of India...

So we are about to finish up a very interesting and dynamic meeting - i cant help but asking them for their commitment, their commitment to do the impossible, to promised me that whatever they do - never to give up, never to back down, always fight for what they believe in, to respect each other, to support each other, and work for and with each other... - they look at me, smile, and promise me - that  they will make this promise to me.. i commit to them if they ever need my thoughts or ideas on anything, that they can contact me, and this seems to be something very BIG for them, they seem very excited about this offer, we give them our e-mails and they are almost fighting over who can copy them first ... - i think we have made a good two-way commitment, i ask them for one other thing, and that is to understand the cause and consequence and focus on resolving the problem with addressing the real cause of why the people do what they do ... they agree with me, i tell them from my own experience, that i have heard it cant be done a million times, and how that motivates me to prove to people that it can be done.. finally we ask them to not look at problems but support with solutions.. These future leaders of India seem to get it, they seem to understand how much responsibility is placed on their young shoulders, and they accept this responsibility.. and one young boy says something that makes me smile, "one day the youth of India will get the chance to shine, and that chance is now.." and with that we finish our meeting ... my friends yes, one day the youth of India will have the chance to shine - that day might come before you know it ...

...."either we find a way, or we will make a way - but one thing that is for sure, there is always a way..."

...Pota - what a celebration..

So today is not only stories about workers and there lifes, today there is also a story about celebration, a celebration that was in September, but when the women in this community found out Susanne and i were coming, they waited till now to celebrate so we could be part of it.. the celebration we are about to witness is call "Puja" which is something leading up to the yearly Diwali (celebration of lights, more about this next week - when it is actually celebrated..), so the celebration of Puja is something in the direction of worthshipping the Goddess Lakshmi and she in return will bless you with wealth, and it works something like this, you have to paint, or add colors on any tool or equipment you use for your work, then a small little alter is prepared, with fruits, rice, some sweets, lights with and without smell  - after that, they do some prayers, funny enough this is something that Kumar is really use to, so he is fast in making it look wonderful, you can see how passionate he is about this, i am sure he wants to make an impression on all of the women that have shown up to share this celebration with us.. - i think he is enjoying being centre of attention, and to be honest i am enjoying the rest from being the centre a lot, i am actually enjoying myself so much with having Kumar ordering the women aside so he can prepare it for them, as he believes that the man has a strong role to play in this.. one thing you might recall from previous postings is that, in the slum, the men arent really playing a very strong role - they are not very active, and all in all they are not really being to much of what we would categorize as a "man" .. so the ladies are very impressed with Kumar stepping up to his responsibility as a man, showing them what a really Indian man should act and be like.. after Kumar and the women are done with all the preparations, we are offered small bags that contains rice, fruits and some sweets, we sit for sometime, eat, talk and just relax, at this moment we could be anywhere in the world, we are enjoying this special moment - and not once does it reach my mind that we are sitting in the middle of the Indian slum, strange isnt it - that with the right people, with the right atmosphere, it doesnt matter where you are.. slum or no slum... its all about making the most out of each moment, this is what India has taught me already .. a lesson i hope never to forget .. - and now we are off for lunch and then meeting with the youth community, i can tell already now, it will be a great evening ...  

..A community leaders story..

So another morning starting with yoga, and this time it seemed like our instructor was pushing us a bit further, new exercises and more focus and explanation today.. - i am getting all adicted to this, i feel i am more relaxed, my breathing is getting better (i mean i have always had problems with my breathing, i breath mainly through my mouth - and yoga is all about nose.. - what a challenge that is for me), so after yoga, a fast wash in cold water, and then off to meet my colleagues for breakfast, and to be honest i am starting to get more and more into the food here, really nice and tasty..

Kumar is waiting for us, and he is taking us direct to a local slum community, this community is for "domestic workers", we enter what seems to be a small little school, or at least something like that, it is a 2 x 4 meter room, with no chairs, a door, a couple of old fans in the sealing, a table and some children drawing on the wall, besides that nothing... - it takes around 2 min. before the room fills up with women, all from this community - all domestic workers, we get introduced as so many times before, and we start with our interview, i want to share with you the story of "Mythili", another wonderful story of doing the impossible..

Mythili is i would guuess in the end of her 40s, a strong women, full of humor, and energy, she finished school when she was 11 - so she didnt speak and write proper, she is sitting and teasing the other "girls" there, she is called a direct and powerful women (which is shown when she slaps our translator hard on her back - in a very friendly way..) she tells us that she was use to do domestic work, until she started to prepare "snacks" and sell it on the street, now she is making more money - it was the organization that i work with that made this happen for her, with self-help programs, with education programs and more.. - now she is better off, what a wonderful story.. unfortunately the story takes a sad turn, when we find out that she lost both her son, and her husband, she lives alone with her mother, nobody to take care of her when she gets older..she starts to talk to us about what has changed, and what stills needs to change, and although these women has done a great job till now, almost the impossible, there is still a long way to go, it is clear to them and clear to us, right
now the are trying to get the minimum wages enforced with a partition signed by the community. But there is something worse coming, something much worse, the local government has decided to evict them all, to make place for new apartments, the bulldozer has already been here a couple of time, every time Mythili has been able to "scare" them off, half of the community has been moved already, it is only a matter of time before the rest will move, unless Mythili takes action, she has tried to get support from the other women, however it seems like they are not willing to support her on this, it seems like the are scared of speaking up, even speaking through Mythili, they are scared, scared of what might happen, to them and their families.. we leave this topic as i can see that she is getting to emotional on this, we ask her what she would like to accomplish still, she tells me that she wants that every "older" woman should have the possibility to learn how to read and write, once again a noble thing, and i believe that Mythili can do this, she can ensure that her community will learn to write and read, the question is really if it will be here or in a different community... Mythili is a strong women - in every sense of the word, it is fantastic and truly amazing to see what she has gone through and still her smile lights up the whole room (that has gone dark because the electricity turns off 11.00), i have found another role model, another community leader, and like some many others like her, it is not about her, it is about her community .. Susanne asks her one last question, "who will take care of you when your mother is not her, when you get old?" - her answer is "Jesus Christ will.." and Mythili he will take very good care of you - with all the good you have done...  

...kids, kids and kids...

So the last story of today / tonight is about a wonderful time spend in company with a children-group. So we get seated in chairs right in front of all the kids, we have a short introduction to who we are, where we are from and why we are here (to be honest i have never seen so many kids staring at me at once..) they ask us a couple of questions, and then we ask them some questions, these kids are in the range from 4 - 14 i guess, then the do a Tamil prayer song for us, the run through their agenda topics from last week, ask each other questions, and literally these children runs this "meeting" themselves, i am sooo impressed and somehow proud of them, they talk about who is the minister of this and the mister of that .. and they interact perfect with each other ... One thing that is funny is to see how fast the news has been travelling, that Susanne and i would be coming, and when we are finally there, within minutes, children and parents are coming over to see us, the crowd is growing... So now we believe that the children have had their part of the program, so we break out the sweets that we have brought, and the children all of a sudden are standing on top of each other - we pass the candy, sweets, chewing gums, all of it around, and the children seems to be enjoying themselves a lot ... - we see a lot of smiles, both from kids and adults... after 10 - 15 min with handing out sweets it is time for us to say our goodbyes to all of them, and here starts the most amazing, crazy, strange, interesting and unexplainable thing soo far, the parents comes up to us to ask for our autographs like we are famous or something, like we are celebrities, we get to sign calendars, books, even the bible... we have men, women, children, old, young coming up taking photos of us, shaking my hand, touching me, thanking me, i have babies being handed to me so they can get close to me, so i can touch with my hand, i have one older man that has been sitting in the back the whole time, coming up to me, placing his hand in mine, moving me hand to his head, making a religious gesture / sign ... he has tears in his eyes... he thanks me for coming, that is the only words he is able to get out... - and then i am like a proper celebraty rushed off to my own personal rickshaw, Kumar fast pulls out of there, while the children are running after us.. Susanne and i are very quiet on the way back - then we start to discuss what just happened, we were treated like kings, almost like holy people, us, two normal people - a normal woman and man from the Nordics, a Mr. and Mrs. average joe and jane .. but then it hits us, that for these people we are the first foreigners that has ever taken the time to come and talk to their children, to visit them in the slum, to see how the live, to listen to them, and spend time with them, for them we are special, for them we are something more, something extra, isnt that funny - because in my eyes i am not special, in my eyes, them living the lives they do, having almost nothing, and still be able to laugh and smile - now that my friends makes them special, that my friends makes them unique..

...so remember whatever you do, never give up, and never stop trying.. - and you are special, you are unique...

..just another day in the slum..

Kumar is arriving some 5 min late and he is apologizing deeply, "i am sorry sir, traffic sir, i am sorry...come come" and we get into the rickshaw and off we go, it seem like Kumar is trying to pick up some of the lost time and is speeding a bit more today than yesterday - i must say that i have full confidence in him abilities to handle his rickshaw.. after a bit of travelling we are at the office again, we meet and greet with the team members that showed up seemingly only to see us, we sit for 5 min with Virgil to brief her on our experiences from last night and what we feel and are going through emotional, it seems to be wasted words, as she is very clear with what we feel - it is like she reads my mind, she sees into my heart, and explains that why what we are about to do for her organization is so important, improve the skills of a selected few - to have them carry this on to the "grass-root" level, and have even more community changes, create even more community leaders. Thanking Virgil for her time, we are again sitting in Kumars blue rickshaw (normal rickshaws are yellow by the way...) and we are off to the slum again for a whole day ..

So our first stop on the road is the organizations office that is located 20 meter from a railroad crossing, on the 2nd floor, its pretty big and taking the location into consideration, actually rather nice. So we start off with a staff meeting, where Susanne and i get to ask the staff members there pretty much anything, they are really engaged in the conversation and time flies, before we know of it - we are off to our first visit, a visit of a "steel fabric".. okay so when i hear "steel fabric" i think of 100s of people, steel everywhere, and loud noise everywhere, i guess i got a bit of steel, some people and a lot of noise correct!! So we go deeper into the slum, to find a couple of what looks to be a house without a front side, it is open like a carage, here we find three young men working with steel, they are eager to invite us in to show us their craft, which exsist of hammering, cutting, welding, and polishing, we meet and greet - we move across the street to meet some more workers, and we soon become the centre of all attention, all eyes are up on us, pictures are being taken, not of them, but funny enough many of the steel workers pulls out a mobile phone and starts snapping pictures of Susanne and i, this here is strange, we get the feeling that we are like celebraties, and that is not a feeling i am use to... - so the story behind this "steel fabric" was and is, that they were use to hire children to do their work, it was cheaper and the children wouldnt complaint at all, thanks to a lot of work from the local teams and all the support staff members, they have been able to take these children out of the fabric and put them back in schools, have men take over this job, sure the salaries are increased a bit, but here is the interesting thing, once the team started explaining the owner of this business that childe labour is wrong and why, what etc.. the owner accepted it and changed his stand-point, and is now an active support of the organization, interesting what a "little" push in the right direction can achieve..(i know it is not that easy - that is not what my point is, it rather being, by engaging people in a two-conversation a lot of things can change..) After the visit to the steel fabric,we work over to our first house visit - we take off our sandals, enter the living room, that also serves as the bedroom in the evening, here we meet a whole group of women, friends, family and others that just came over to see Susanne and i, all in all they live 6 people in a room that is no bigger than a 3x3 meter room, with a tiny kitchen, a something looking like a toilet / bathroom, we are offer my new found favorit drink CAJ, and off goes the conversation, the women are telling us about their lives, their stories, about their families, their children, their hopes and dreams, all so different, and yet the denominator in their lives seems to be the same, it seems to be - that they have taken owership over their own lives, they are taking responsibility for their own future, getting educated, getting busy with work, providing a better future for their children, oh and where is the husband in this equation, that was my question as well - so i ask them this question, and the whoopeling starts, their husbands are unemployeed, out drinking caj, or in many worse cases out getting drunk.. - what a rolemodel they are... and yet it seems that the second most importanting thing these women grave for, is simply respect from their husbands, i have difficulties accepting that, difficulties with it because these women deserves much more than just respect from their husbands.. they are leaders, community leaders, one woman even ran for office at this current election 3 days ago, yet she only looks for respect from her husband - how ironinc!

After this visit we move over to another one, this time in much worse housing conditions, i am sorry to be this direct, but you cant even call it a house, it is 4 walls, with something looking like a roof .. inside is a women on the ground, with a kaske on her left leg, she had it stitched some 4 weeks ago, and now is not able to work, and she feels guilty for the fact that she cant work right now, we hear her story of how she is taking care of 3 children, her husband is sometimes working, money are short, but she some how manages to "find" some 100 rupees that she ask one of the neighbours to take and go and buy some drinks for Susanne and i, we fast insist that we dont need anything more and that we had caj and water and and and... i couldnt bare having her spend unnesecary money on buying me something to drink. I ask her what her dreams are - and she answers, to have my daugthers to go to university and marry good, i ask her about her dreams for herself, she politely shakes her head, and tells me "i dont have any dreams for myself, only for my children, i am not important, only they are"... - she is almost in tears, i feel tears coming to my eyes, imagine thinking that you, yourself is not "important" .. i politely correct her, "for your children you are important, for this community you are, and for that i thank her" ... i think she accepts my words, but i dont think she will change her opinion about herself...

We get back into the rickshaw, move to our final house visit, here we meed a grandmother, taking care of her grandchild, her daughter - well she is out working, we start to talk to this grandmother, she proudly tells us that one soon works in a good job (a bank or something), and her other son is working in Qutar in construction, then we talk to her about her own life, her story, and she gladly starts to share with us, it is a warm story, about her passion for cooking, that is now a business of hers, she was recently rewarded with a tender to cook for the local hospital, 3 meals a day, so it is a lot of business, you can see that she is very proud of herself, and for great reasons, but her story doesnt stop her, she even has people learning to cook from her, she is sharing her ways of cooking, the preparation of different dishes with other women, and she hires women in to help her with the cooking for the hospital ... we ask her about what the big problem now in the slum is - as child labour, employment and opportunities are slowly becoming better - she tells us her fears, and a big problem in the slum, the problem is a very well known problem, it is called human trafficing... - and here i start to sweat even more, human trafficking happens some 500 meter from where i am sitting, and she tells us what happens.. I wrote out a chapeter on this as well - but after longer time thinking i have decided not to post it on my blog, i guess the reasons are obvious...

...a perfect start on a long day...

after a troubled sleep, my alarm clock starts buzzing at 6.30 - time to get up, to be honest i feel like i just went to sleep, i didnt sleep that well, the emotions and impressions from last night is still to fresh in my memory.. Anandhi and her story kept me awake most of the night, i kept reflexting on my life so far, what i have achieved, what i would like to achieve still and for what higher purpose, it turned into a internal conversation about what is the price we pay for our material happiness, and to some extend how much we own, versus how much our items owns us.. - i guess my view on many things are being challenged to an extend i have never experienced before, and i feel lucky for this incredible reality check, i think we should all have one sooner rather than later...mine just completely took me by surprise - i didnt know it would be this difficult... okay any-ways so back to my morning ...

at 6.40 i am up and around - waiting impatiently for my first session of yoga, yupp, we managed to engage a instructor to come and give us lessons in yoga, and i am soo excited. So we get introduced to our instructor, a very "warm" man - that welcomes us, and then starts with the background of yoga, where it comes from, the different types of yoga.. and here it becomes interesting - personally i didnt know this, but yoga is a physical, mental, and spiritual discipline (i kinda thought it was only a bit of stretching - how naive i was, and i would soon feel that...), so now the goal of yoga, or of the person practising yoga as you might know, is the attainment of a state of perfect spiritual insight and tranquillity, it is indeed the "tool" if you like, to have everyone practising yoga reach his or her maximum potential - and this potential is happiness... and this is reaching through the exercises. So after the history we have some very simple breathing exercises to warm up with, a bit of bending, and moving arms up and down, each of the exercises we do, it shown slowly, then explained in details of what purpose it serves for your mind and body, and it all makes sooo much sense, we continue to do exercises for another 30 min - and i have to admit i am by now starting to break a sweat, and i can feel that my muscles are very stiff and not at all flexible, i will for sure need more training if i am to do some of the things that our instructor can do.. - but all beginning might be difficult, but after finishing of the session with a slight cool down session, i have to admit that i feel very much more relaxed, i am not sure if it happiness i feel right now, but for sure - i have indeed worked up and appetite and off to breakfast i go, time is ticking and Kumar is soon coming to pick us up.. - what a morning, what a start on my day - India is really showing itself from its charming side this morning..

..true beauty in the Slum of Chennai..

So i have had what i believe, are life changing moments a couple of times, and i have had a couple of encounters with people that have really changed my life, but i have never EVER EVER had anybody touch me so deep in my heart as today .. just now sitting in my room writing this thinking back on this moment - i am almost having tears in my eyes.. - this was truly a moment that made me realize so many things - and it only took 60 min ...

now i need to tell you one thing, and that is that i never wanted to come to Chennai to live the "larger" part of life, i want to see the real India - and oh my God did i see that, so we got into a rickshaw (Kumar was taking Virgil to a presentation so we didnt have his company..) we take a ride along side the habour area, and see what has happened there, litterally the government decided to make a highway going to the habour, and with this decision they tore down the housing of the people living there, to have them move, move into smaller flats, have them give up everything they had, however the government made one mistake, they though the people would actually leave, but they didnt - so the rebuild their houses into something that looks like small sheds, no electricity, no water, pretty much no nothing, we have now officially enter the Slum area of Chennai, the ghetto .. - i mentioned once about the contrast in Chennai - but this beats all i have ever seen, the polution, the trash everywhere, the poverty there, it is indescribable... - it is horrible at first, then overwhelming, then something happens to you - you notice the emotions, the energy and the life there, and it really gets to you.. so now where we are going is even more powerful in terms of feelings and emotions, we walk for around 10 - 15 in the side alleys of the slum, people are smiling at us, looking with big eyes at us, you feel the interest in you from them, so many of the kids are approach you to say a simple "hi" only to run away shy .. - it is soo nice, sweet and refreshing, i dont remember ever feeling this welcomed into any community. After some 15 min walk we reach our destination, it is a small little house, outside the house we are greeted by Anandhi, Anandhi welcomes us to her house, i guess she is in her mid or late 30s, its difficult to judge (after all it doesnt really matter) she places some red paint on our foreheads as it is custom to do, when you welcome someone into your house. The house is small and we walk directly into her living room, where we are sat down and offer some CAJ - we get introduced to Anandhi, and here is her story ..

Anandhi has been married for 19 years, she has got 2 children, a boy and a girl, she has never studied and is not ashamed of saying so, out of 19 years of marriage, she tells us that she has had many years of fighting with her husband, it has taking a torn on her family. However what you might do not know is that Anandhi is a very talented stitcher, she is making very beautiful Sari (the tradional dress for women in India), actually Anandhi is so good in this that some 6 years ago, she decided to change her life, she got a loan and support from the NGO we work for - to set up a small business, doing stitching and making sari, now 6 years later, guess what she is doing, she is stitching for big companies that are exporting her work to other countries including Europe, her cloth can be found in shops in India, but it doesnt stop there, she could easily take all she makes, move to another house and leave her community behind her, however she decided against that, she stayed and not only did she stay, but she is now teaching other women how to stitch so they can make a living for themselves as well, she is helping them set up business for themselves, she is improving and changing the mind-set of her community - a community that just happened to be located dead-central of the slum. Anandhi is a fantastic woman, she talks to us about her hopes for her children, her daughter comes to greet us as well - her daughter wants to study software engineering, her son already studies mechinical engineering, they are having a bright future in front of them.. her marriage is working much better now, and she is financially much better off now, but what is one of the things she is the most proud of is, that her husband now finally respects her... - respects her, i dont only respect Anandhi, i admire her, i once again start to feel humble in her presence, i feel like i have taken so many things for granted in my life, i have so many things in my life that i dont need, and in general i have been so lucky i guess in many aspects, and i havent truly appreciated this - i feel a bit ashamed of this in front of Anandhi, knowing what she has lived through, i guess i can only change my future - and accept where i am coming from, so that is one "demon" i have to fight i guess. So i am curious about one thing, and i ask Anandhi, what motivates her to do such a thing, and what her dreams are .. her answer is simple, direct, she does what she does because she doesnt want woman to be standing outside their houses feeling they are not worth anything, she wants women to feel self-confident, respected in their communities, respect from their husbands, and moreover she wants them to help other people, again i hear this "pay it forward" approach.. and that is what community building is all about .. and for her dreams, well simple - her daughter to go to university and graduate .... Anandhi is a rolemodel, a source of inspiration for many women, a community leader, a change agent, and i sincerely hope that i will get to meet her once again - she touched something inside of me, deep inside of me, she showed me how much good there is in this world, how much good that can come out of something that poor, something that pure i havent see in a long time.. - if ever! We leave her house - and for as long as we can see her, she is standing outside, with her daughter and other people coming over to hear the "gossip" of the two foreigners coming to visit her, she is smiling and waving to us, i smile back at her and then i can no longer see her, but i feel her inspiration inside of me, i feel her passion burning in me, i feel her warmth, her kidness, and her happiness inside of me - and i know, if i ever will be in a situation that seems hopeless to me, i will think of Anandhi, i will think of her story.. i will never forget her... - oh and by the way Anandhi is Tamil for "happiness", and that is the right name for her, happiness ... Anandhi thank you..

"we are visitors on this planet, we are here for ninety or a hundre years at the very most, during that period we must try to do something good, something useful, with our lives, if you contribute to other peoples happiness, you will find the true goal, the true meaning of life"  ..... Dalai Lama

...First day at work..

Its 9.30 and Kumar our driver is here to pick us up, we get in to what seems to be a very luxurious rickshaw, nice, clean and very well taken care of, Kumar is a very good driver, doesnt drive to fast, is very respect full, you can clearly see that he has been told to take good care of Susanna and i.. As we travel to our destination, today it is out near the harbour we are going - the HQ of the NGO we are working for, the drive takes us near by the beach where we have been spending a couple of evenings already - it takes us further, it takes us down some side alleys into a complete new district for us, i am excited, we are about to step into our first team meeting with the NGO. So after a bit of conversation with Virgil, we get introduce to the extended team, to sit-through their weekly review, talking through their last week and next week activities, it is exciting to sit in on this meeting, to hear their issues, their excitement sharing their stories.. after roughly an hour or so - the meeting is over, and we get moved into a smaller room where our lunch is served ... unbelievable - the food is soo tasty, the best till now, the chicken is perfect, i have to control myself not to eat to much (which is really difficult - because it truly is very nice).

After lunch we get to sit with the "core team" to discuss the next couple of days and weeks, we get their input on what they thing needs special attention, they give us a better understand of how the organization works, and what it is focusing on, what is the structure etc.. it is such a dynamic conversation .. and at one point i realize that we talked non-stop for 2 hours almost (it seems like it was a couple of min. only).. So now it is time to leave the office to get into the "field", and here starts a new episode of my life ...  

..going out of my comfort zone..

okay so a bit of self-reflection here, the moment has come for it, i guess i am known for many different things, one thing i might not be known for is my emotional side.. so i will go a bit out of my comfort zone to share with you some of my personal feelings right now, i will challenge myself a bit with opening up - and we will see how that goes, so bare with me, as this is new territory for me..

right now i am sitting in my hotel room, tv is on in the background, i can hear the noise from the street, i can hear some Tamil being spoken, i can hear the rickshaws passing, but to be honest my thoughts are elsewhere - i relive the conversation that i had today, the passion and the feelings, the believes and hopes that was shared at our meeting today. i feel i am standing at a truly defining moment in my life, tomorrow in roughly 12 hours i will go to the office of Arunodhaya, we will meet with the "core" group of people from the NGO - to discuss our project, and the scope of work over the next 4 weeks, the deliverables, our success criteries and so on, how can you define success criteria for such a project, as long as there will be children abused and exploited we are not successful, as long as children will be put up for trafficking we are not successfull, as long as people are not able to become financial sustainable, we are not successful, and as long as children cant be children - we are not successful, as long as children, all children has access to education we are not successful

... so right now i am feeling lost, i am feeling emotional, i feel humble, i feel a bit guilty, in terms of going into that NGO well knowing that less than 4 weeks from now i will leave back to my comfortable life -  having all of those luxurious items that i rarely ever use anyways... - this truly is a challenge for me, right now it feels like i am being weighted down by a mountain, this level of expectations is something they dont teach you in school, at the university or at your management training..puuhhh there is a ton of "what-ifs" flying around in my mind, i guess there is a lot of insecurity, a lot of emotional stress, and also a strong sense of helplessness - a friend of mine once told me "martin you cant carry the problems of the world on your shoulders".. although i know he is right - this is the time for me to step up, take responsibility, leave a legacy, make a difference, and take my load of the work here, Virgil and her team has been doing it for such a long time, so we will go in and make a difference, we will go in and give it our all, we will strive to deliver our maximum, and when all is said and done - we will have been successful.. - but i will always keep in the back of my mind, that this is a project that will never finish until the vision of Virgil and her team is fulfilled ... - and as long as we have leaders like her - there is still hope - she inspires you, so impassionate you, and she motivates you ... she makes the impossible seem possible, and to be honest that is what we all need - i doubt there has ever been a person in my life that has made such a strong impression on me, so fast, as she has - i am left feeling humble that she and her organization has choosen me as their "consultant", and that they feel i am the right person to support and help them, i feel honored and blessed for this opportunity..

so my friends a bit of emotions from me this time around - this assignment truly is a life changing moment for me (for all of us here in Chennai i guess) it is making sense out of all the dots in my life till now, looking back at my life it seems like this is what i have been working towards..

please remember one thing: "to feel that something is impossible, really is just because we didnt try yet - try and you will see that impossible is everything but that" .. i believe in you - believe that you can make a change, become the change.. and i will do the same ...

.. a defining moment...

I know i promised you that i wouldnt be to serious on this blog - and about my stay here in India, however i will need to disappoint you a bit, as i will take a bit more serious approach, at least for this posting. So the team and i, just arrived back from a visit with your clients, we started at 11.00 and just finished now 17.00 so a lot of talks and networking, a great meeting, but moreover a eye opener for me.. so let me give you a bit of background about myself that you might not know, every since i can remember i have been involved in community services, volunteering and so on, i have this firm believe that each of us has a responsibility to give back to our local communities, and through this collective effort improve our communities, i have been doing this for years, and frankly speaking has been starting to loose my way, loose my energy and passion for it - as i didnt feel that anything has changed, i didnt feel that people would finally start to live up to their responsibility - to take the lead on changes, and become positive change agents, so i guess this trip was and is for me a chance to get re-energized to continue my efforts..

So now imagine the things i have been called because i believe in the fact that one person can make a difference, that one man or woman can do some good in society - words like naive, stupid, romantic and worse ... - i have seen people shaking their heads at me, when i talk about social responsibility, when i tell people to stop complaining and start acting ... hopeless once in a while.. and rather demotivating, but friends things are getting heated up here in Chennai :-))

So finally i managed to meet with my Client Ms. Virgil D'Sami, the founder of the NGO that i will be working with together with Susanna my colleague from Sweden, so let me give you an idea about what ARUNODHAYA - the name of the NGO is having of vision

.."To build a social movement that will uproot all forms of exploitation and oppression of children and promote and protect the basic human rights of children enabling them to enjoy a dignified childhood"...

What do you think of that ? i know what i think - and the only thing i can say to it is WOW!! a dignified childhood, basic human rights of children, exploitation and oppression - what a cause, what a noble thing to strive for, and here i am almost loosing my faith in doing good, well friends guess what, i am BACK!!!! and this time i am not coming alone, i was sitting in a room with 40 - 50 other people that might be naive, that might be "stupid" that might be a lot of things, but we ALL believe we can change the world - so either come and join or step aside because we are getting started - and we bring passion, believe and change with us...

Susanna and i was talking to Virgil for maybe 5 hours non-stop, what a facinating woman, what an inspirational leader, and what a great person! so some of the thing we talked about where circled around child labour, what is the reason for this, what is the future of these abused children, how it creates a evil circle, what is the responsibility of the governmental sector, the private sectors, the responsibility of you and me.. so look at this, although a child might want to be a child, often in India this is taken away from them due to the fact of parents getting divorced, alcohol issues and other reasons, could you imagine your younger brother or sister, daughter or son being "sold" of to a company to work 12 - 14 hours a day, often resulting in serious health issues, accidents, and in many cases has violence involved ... - so i cant accept that and i wont, so here i am going to help and support this NGO with education so the children can be children, have the right to play and be kids.. so how do we do that, well getting ride of children labour is something that the government can forbid, however what has been seen is that child labour is moved from big companies into smaller housings so although illegal still exists, you need to change the approach, you need to change the mind-set of the local communities, you need to challenge the system, and get people to want to achieve more. Now our task is to help and support a core group of people in the organization in project management so they can teach and train others in project management, so they can start up business, go and make a living for themselves and through this improve their financial situation, hence make child labour useless. So we will support and train the core group so in the end every child can have the right to be a child, and then finally have the right to get an education, and this right to having an education is a very provocative statement as it directly challenges the so-called "cast" system here in India, so that hosts a whole different set of problems.. oh and try to imagine you coming from the slum - where would you study ? what would you pay books with ? school uniforms with ?

What we are looking at here, is that education has to be made key to the success, if you dont get the women / men more educated, you can get rid of child labour, and you dont get people to be interested in education unless you can show something worth considering, with education - what is that ? imagine you live below the poverty level, you have some 25 rupees a day which is not even 1/2 USD, how do you sell education to them, they never went to school, maybe they dont even know how to read or write - please promote education to them, have them spend their last money on that... - it is really not that straight forward, however education is the key to a better life for these people, it is the key to have their children be children, so we have to find a way to make people listen... we have to make them want to carry out this change, education is the key to eliminating child labour, it is the key to improve your living standards, your economical sustainability..You need to see child labour as part of the issue - the consequence but not the cause, the root cause is different, the outcome is child labour - and it is terrible.

Now as child labour has been made illigal in India with recent changes, a new issue starts to arise, and that is the youth exploiratation - youth are in the age of 15 - 18, they are not covered by the legal restrains, and they are to young to join a union, they are, if you will trapped in the middle, this now is starting to host a new set of issues, you cover one issue to uncover another, this is a evil circle...

Many can argue for the fact that this is a straight forward task, to teach a person to train other people, however you need to take into consideration that these people are not from the social upper-class, the are from the slum, they are the lowest low of the "cast" classes, so this is where it will be tricky - it needs to be applicable for a person that doesnt care about theoretical ideas, but needs practical approaches, so thats what we will adopt, a practical approach. With the project management training and train the trainer sessions i hope that we will be able to increase the self-confidence of the women and men being involved in this organization, and i hope and know they will be able to "pay it forward" .. to become change agents of their communities, so they can start youth groups, women support groups, men support groups and make it spread like rings in water ... to make it a powerful positive circle...

here is my last thoughts on todays meeting, call me naive, call me silly, call me romantic, call me whatever you need and want - i believe that everybody has rights, i believe that children has rights, i believe that children has the rights to have a childhood, a childhood that doesnt include working, but includes playing... i believe i can make a difference, i believe i can change the world - and i just came from a meeting where people from +10 different countries, 3 different continents came together - to share one vision, to change the world to something better, now you might not believe in this, and that is up to you - but as i said, dont stand in our way, because we are out on a mission, and that mission is to change.. so come and join... it will be worth it... i wont be easy - but i promise it will be worth it ... We do make a difference, we can change people - ... dont give up...
         
"Seeing a child work how can there be love in this world, childhood is a once in a life-time opportunity, that every child should experience"


Till our next time - stay true to your belief...

...up and at it ...

Goodmorning everybody - i guess for some of us it is morning, for others it is still sleeping time.. - so here is what i managed to do till now, i managed to finish the film "Titanic", who would ever have thought that i would be watching Titanic in India, for sure not me... okay i didnt watch all of it - just had it in the background..So after our evening briefing last night we went back to the beach, God i cant tell you how much i have missed the feeling of sand between my toes, i havent been at the sea side for almost 11 years (i guess i need a real holiday soon) so the water even at 21 in the evening was soooo hot..:-)) So getting back from the "east coast" we took a rickshaw back, with 3 in the back and 1 in the front (i feel so guilty for letting Quynh - our colleague sit in the front with the driver, who said anything about me being a gentleman..) and guess what happened, yes you guessed it, the driver got lost and we ended up circling around our blocks for like 5 - 10 min before we finally found our street - how about that for some excitement on a sunday evening..

So after some hours of sleep, it seems i am getting more use to the heat now at night - i got up, and went to join Susanna, Fred and Quynh for breakfast, this was by the way the first Indian breakfast that i have had, and it was very nice, toast, omelet and some other "stuff" (green stuff - taste nice) and some "caj" - which is pretty much tea with milk in it, and a ton of sugar... so now i have to get it out of my body before i have a sugar attack :-)) here in India people are really into sweet stuff :-)) so now i will do a small little work-out in the room (plan to head over to the gym tonight after work) and then at 10.30 we will go off to meet our clients, colleagues and other partners at a nearby hotel.. So i guess it will be a long but very exciting day ..

listen after tonight i will be able to explain to all of you what my assignment will be, as we will have it all clarified ... - rather late than never right ...

friends till our next time, enjoy your breakfast - i know i did.. :-))

...which way am i looking... left or right...up or down ...

My first Thali - i can get use to this, it lies good in my belly, i feel great, we step outside the restaurant, and get met with 35 degrees and sunshine - perfect... so now what, well what else can you do on a sunday than to go an see a temple, so we decide to do a 30 - 45 min walk (who cares about time, its sunday and i am in Chennai) to the temple, which is a temple made for Shiva, one of the Gods, - now i will not give you to much story here, but it here comes a bit ...:

Tirumayilai Shivastalam,
There seems to be many legends around this temple. However the one i found the most interesting is the one about the Goddess Parvati that was distracted during her daily ritual by a beautiful peacock dancing at a distance. Lord Shiva a bit upset about this and in order to make her realise the importance of total devotion to him, turned her into a peahen and sent her to the earth. The peahen arrived at this temple and started a penance in order to prove her devotion (how about that..). After a long and severe penance the Lord Shiva finally took her back into his fold. As Goddess Parvati was living in this place as a pea-hen, the place came to be known as 'Mayil-puri' (Mayil means pea-hen in Tamil) which was later anglicised to Mylapore.

And there you have it .. i can tell you some of the stories i have been told already about Shiva and Khrisna - are so facinating... okay so one more thing about the temple, we had to walk around the temple the symbolic "3" times before we could leave, and of course we had to take of our sandals.. - it was really a cool place, and i almost forgot to mention it, it was full of a very special guests, it was full of COWS... - you heard right folks, cows, holy cows .. coming from Denmark - having a slightly different point of view on cows, it was facinating to see the respect the indians showed to these cows.. - that wouldnt go to well in Denmark .. - we would end up eating the poor thing

So after finishing the 3 laps in the temple and finally getting our sandals and shoes back, it was seriously funny, one lady took our sandals and shoes hostages "noooo moneeey, no shoes"... it wasnt until one of the team members, coming from the northern part of india started to get involved did the "hostages" get released .. - this was by the way another funny story... remind me later to tell you this one .. Anyways, Fred, Ralph and i decide to walk home to the hotel, great idea boys, map, idea of direction, water, compass anything useful to navigate - nope we do the only thing you can do, as a man, we go with our "gut" feeling on where we think, believe and hope the hotel might be, needless to say we get lost, however you will not hear me officially admit to that, my take on it is that "we werent lost, we just didnt know where we were"... anyways we end up having a soft drink at a local shop, put in the address in the iphone, and the 1,3 km to the hotel - so we were close, yeah well "close but no cigar".. what did we learn from this experience, a couple of things did become more clear to me, traffic - forget about making sense out of it, it is instinct based - so look left and right, up and down, and accept the fact that the horn is beeing honked at you anyway you cross, besides accepting this fact we also slowly became a bit more brave on how to close the street - it doesnt take a long time for India to push it-self onto you ... - it is an incredible overwhelming feeling of how you become sucked into it, it absorbs you, and it will eventually get you - there is no reason or purpose to fight it, that is what i have realized, so guards down, and enjoy... - live and let live... As our facilitator Gavin would put it, be flexible and open minded - and thats what i am trying to do..

so along side this trip Fred, Ralph and i come up with this great idea, and the idea is "a 100 things to do in India" ... needless to say that the list is not complete yet (so if you have been to India - let me know what to add in your opinion) so i will start to list some of them here ... and folks your comments are always welcome ... - oh as you might have noticed, i dont take myself to serious, so guess what the list will be, okay in case the question was to hard, heres the answer, the list will not be tooo serious...

.... - so friends here goes, "a 100 things to do in India" ... first 10 things ...

1) have a fast ride with a Rickshaw
2) get lost in Chennai
3) get "spiced" up with some local Thali
4) be ripped off by a taxi driver
5) See some status of Shiva and Krishna
6) have a kingfisher (local beer) or two
7) tap a rickshaw on the roof while it passes you by and almost hits you
8) address all rickshaw drivers as "boss"
9) get chased by a wild dog on the street
10) try yoga

...anybody up for a bit of teaming..

i wake up, soar neck (i guess aircondition over night is not a smart idea), a sligth headach, and tired - another night where i didnt manage to sleep proper, this is turning into a bad habbit, okay up, fast shower and get dressed and the off to our prep meeting (our company security team is here to meet us..) it seems like we are living in the "upper" class of Chennai, and that "law and order" is tight as the former CM (Chief minister) of India is living near by (that explains the armed guards out on some of the streets. Anyway after some briefings, so other agenda items, we get to do our first "team building" event, - draw you life, sounds pretty simple but for a non-creative person like myself it is pretty tough, i end up presenting something that Picasso couldnt even do .. - yes folks it was that bad (a lot of my team members - were nice enought to lie to me, and tell me it was good.. - guys thanks for the moral support), oveall it was great fun, to hear life stories from my team members in 2 min. max. per person .. so thats that, and now lunch time...

outside it is 30 degrees - and i am in a matter of min. dripping .. litterally dripping, taxi comes, "yes boss, i take you, come come boss" (i am starting to answwer back with "boss") and that how it is done, 80 rupees later, we are at a very nice restaurant, we have something that reminded me of a tomatoe soup, it was a bit sweet, but very nice, and then comes the typical India bread - wow it is soo good, and and Thali - which is, i guess one of the most traditional dishes in india, so for those of you that like me are new to indian food here is what thali is all about ... - imagine a round metal tray, yes one of those that is used in the bar to carry drinks on, then imagine 8 - 10 small metal cups with different sauces, imagine adding some rice there, and remember it is all on that metal tray, and on the bottom of the tray is a leaf from a plant or three or something..so you place the rice on the leaf, add your choice of sauce and mix it with your RIGHT hand (remember the left hand is for your toilet stuff..) and then you sling it into your mouth and it is PERFECT!! a bit spicy, not to much, and very tasty - so i have to admit this old saying .. that food is tasting better when you eat with your hands - in this case it is soo true... - wonderful lunch, again beats the typical one of sandwich and coke.. oh and i forgot to mention that the Thali is vegi-food, and i am not considering myself a big vegi-fan, but i am getting there...

Friends - remember one thing, while eating Thali, use your right hand, and leave the left your private visits :-)))